We once again I suppose I should start my post by apologizing for my lack of posts. I know, I suck at blogging. One of these days maybe I'll actually remember to blog and then more people will actually follow me and then there will actually be a point to my blogging. But until then, all I can do is say sorry to a nonexistent audience. How terrific.
Well I broke up with Koree. Two days ago now, and I know that's horrible timing because, I mean, it's Christmas Break, when everything is supposed to be happy. But, you know, I wasn't so I decided that I had to do something about it. I mean, I wasn't rude about it. I was very nice. I had my reasons, and I believe that they were very good reasons, and I sought out the advice of a couple good girlfriends and they thought my reasons were very good too. But naturally, he had to make it hard on me by not accepting it and fighting and arguing about it. Naturally. And then, to top it all off, after professing his love for me and begging me to reconsider, he goes and gets a new girlfriend THE NEXT DAY. Some love, right?
Anyway, this other guy has started texting me a lot the past few days. And I know what you're thinking, I'm not any better than Koree right? Wrong. I did nothing to encourage this guy, I don't even know for sure if he does like me, and I don't plan on doing anything about it at the moment. I just want to figure out my life, figure out what I want, and if things end up going in his direction at some point... Well then I guess that's where my life is leading. If not, then oh well. I just need a nice break from stupid boys, because apparently my judgement isn't the best, if we're basing it on my past few choices.
But on to these mind games that I speak of. This guy that's been texting me... Well he's confusing. He always says things and makes these comments that could definitely be taken as, I guess we'll call it, "interest." But at the same time, they don't necessarily have to be taken that way. They could be completely innocent, or completely full of connotation, though if they're innocent he needs to calm down on his casual flirtatiousness, because really, that's just a bit much for just having a little bit of fun.
And the thing is, I don't even know yet if I'm interested in him. I mean, he's totally the type of guy I would generally go for, but there's a bit of baggage to the situation that makes it a little more risky than your average guy. And plus, I just got out of a relationship so how am I supposed to know for certain what I want yet? So I guess I'm kind of glad that he's keeping me guessing at the moment because at least that way I get a little more time to figure out what I want.
Oh well. All I can say is that I'm way happier now that I got the courage to go through a breakup, and I'm not stressing about it anymore. This day is definitely better than the last.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Saturday, November 19, 2011
My Tech Problems
So I have had some serious technilogical issues. My blogging has been all but nonexistant, which sucks because I really love the outlet.
Anyway, I have an amazing new boyfriend Koree, whom I love, and that's definitely new, so there's that. Also, he has decided that he is going to enlighten me into the world of gaming, because I am totally not a gamer and apparently I should be. I've never played Call of Duty, never played Halo, and until yesterday I had never played Modern Warfare. I was playing with Koree and his friend Trey, and a few of my friends were there watching, and it was one of the most hilarious things ever. The girls were sympathizing with me because they knew that they would have been just as wonderful as I at the game, but they boys were rolling with laughter. Except Koree, who managed to keep a straight face as he assured me that my gaming inability didn't cause him to love me any less. He even paused his game and put his remote control down at one point, and walked away from the game to talk to me. Apparently that constitutes a keeper.
So anyway, he's very determined to slowly introduce me to video game world, and he said he's going to start me on Tetris. I'm a little insulted because I can ideed play Tetris. I grew up playing that, SuperMario and Donkey Kong. I mean, I'm not a complete loser, I have SOME experience. Just not in any of the modern games. The ultimate goal of this quest is, I believe, to have me playing Wonderland. I have no idea what that is. My boyfriend is such a geek, and I love it.
Anyway, I've finally managed to get my computer issues fixed, so hopefully I'll be blogging again, and I will try my hardest to not forget. I do have a horrible memory.
Oh well. I must now eat a wonderful lunch, prepared by my mother, for my entirely family who is randomly in town. This has been a great day so far. Heck, it's been a good week. Most definitely better than the last.
Monday, October 31, 2011
The Fears of an Eavesdropper
As I sit in AP Literature, blogging from my handy dandy iPhone, eavesdropping (inadvertently) on the conversations of my surrounding classmates, I start freaking out. They are talking about college, something that I am definitely not prepared to listen to or think about. College is scary. Tr real world is scary. Embarking on the crazy adventure of life is scary. I don't like scary.
But rapidly the conversation changes. Now I hear criticism of the Twilight franchise, followed by praise of that of Harry Potter (they have their priorities straight), followed by a general agreement that most people anymore don't watch movies made before the year 2000. Which is very sad. There are some great movies made before the 21st century, movies that are decades old. Funny Face, Casablanca, The Wizard of Oz for goodness sakes! People are do unfortunately deprived food entertainment these days.
Which leads my mind to the severe lack of culture in my tiny Arkansan town. We have no theater, no opera house, no veritable museum. This is, for lack of better assessment, a hick town, inhabited densely byhose who spend their weekends drinking beer while watching the NASCAR race or out fishing. Not that I'm discrediting fishing, but people should really travel a bit, see a play, gaze upon some fine art. Take advantage of opportunity people! I myself do not claim to be "cultured," whatever that may entirely encompass, but at least I try. I enjoy a good museum, I've seen more plays and musicals than your average person, and I would gladly jump on the chance to take a little jaunt outside the country or attend an opera. Call me crazy, or desperate to experience new things. Either way, I want it.
Ans now I'm back to adventure, back to living life well, having fun while doing so, all while being scared to death. Lovely. What a way to live.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Remember
Remember all the times we had. Remember how we laughed and cried. Remember how we loved each other. Remember how we promised we'd always be friends, for the rest of our lives.
Remember how we all got along in preschool and kindergarten. Remember how we all played together. Remember how we ran and jumped and climbed. Remember how we raced to the swings. Remember how we figured out the perfect combination of kids to put on each side of the see-saw, so that we could all see-saw together. Remember elementary crafts, and class pets. Remember growing older and going to middle school.
Remember being too cool for see-saws. Remember walking around and talking during recess. Remember when we played sports together. Remember how we used to be best friends. Remember matball in P.E. Remember traveling to basketball games and doing ridiculous things. Remember my mom braiding everyone's hair before a game. Remember our first cell phones. Remember starting band. Remember being in choir together. Remember growing older and going to junior high.
Remember not being in the same classes with everyone all day. Remember all of our crazy teachers. Remember Ms. George, who said she didn't like us, but really did. Remember learning to type correctly in keyboarding. Remember struggling through that first year of advanced math. Remember struggling through that second year of advanced math. Remember struggling through that third year of advanced math. Remember getting a good grade in all three of those classes. Remember having to make pillows in Home Economics. Remember playing pep songs at our first football game. Remember our first pep rally. Remember traveling to volleyball games and playing Truth or Dare on the bus. Remember the first year of summer band, and the second, and third, and fourth. Remember learning to march, and our first half-time show. Remember how if felt when we won our first contest. Remember thinking about how old all the seniors were. Remember when we got our permits. Remember going to Orlando. Remember growing older and going to high school.
Remember feeling like the old kids. Remember having Mr. Sparks, and always pulling pranks on him. Remember how everyone could do all of their math because of him. Remember everything we learned from him besides math. Remember getting our driver's licenses. Remember all the things we hit with our cars. Remember all the times we complained about wearing our band uniforms. Remember all the football games we won, and lost. Remember all the band contests we went to. Remember how we always complained about English in 10th grade. Remember how we couldn't stand our Spanish teachers. Remember how we loved Mrs. Huff and Mrs. Weygandt. Remember how we drug ourselves through the Nations game. Remember how we forced ourselves to do a History Day project. Remember how we always goofed off in Study Hall. Remember all the great times we had a play rehearsal. Remember all the high notes we sang, rounds of the awkward game we played, and lines we didn't really memorize. Remember Matt Nathanson, Maroon 5, and Train. Remember going to San Antonio. Remember watching all of our friends graduate and go to college. Remember finishing our junior year with the realization that we had only one year left. Remember Drama class, and choir, and band, and English, and History, and Math.
Remember everything, because it's almost gone. Remember everything, because everything is worth remembering. Remember our friends, our boyfriends and girlfriends, our teachers. Remember all the times you did something stupid. Remember every time we got teary eyed from laughing so hard. Remember all the movie nights, the dance parties, the road trips. Remember school and all the work we did, how we thought we would explode from all the stress. Remember applying to colleges and for scholarships. Remember acceptance letters, and choosing a college. Remember our last night as high school students. Remember getting our diplomas. Remember being done, and how we felt when we accomplished that goal that we've been working toward for the past eighteen years. Remember our final moments with our friends before we become college students. Remember our last summer together. Remember everything.
Remember all the times we had. Remember how we laughed and cried. Remember how we loved each other. Remember how we promised we'd always be friends, for the rest of our lives.
Remember me.
Remember how we all got along in preschool and kindergarten. Remember how we all played together. Remember how we ran and jumped and climbed. Remember how we raced to the swings. Remember how we figured out the perfect combination of kids to put on each side of the see-saw, so that we could all see-saw together. Remember elementary crafts, and class pets. Remember growing older and going to middle school.
Remember being too cool for see-saws. Remember walking around and talking during recess. Remember when we played sports together. Remember how we used to be best friends. Remember matball in P.E. Remember traveling to basketball games and doing ridiculous things. Remember my mom braiding everyone's hair before a game. Remember our first cell phones. Remember starting band. Remember being in choir together. Remember growing older and going to junior high.
Remember not being in the same classes with everyone all day. Remember all of our crazy teachers. Remember Ms. George, who said she didn't like us, but really did. Remember learning to type correctly in keyboarding. Remember struggling through that first year of advanced math. Remember struggling through that second year of advanced math. Remember struggling through that third year of advanced math. Remember getting a good grade in all three of those classes. Remember having to make pillows in Home Economics. Remember playing pep songs at our first football game. Remember our first pep rally. Remember traveling to volleyball games and playing Truth or Dare on the bus. Remember the first year of summer band, and the second, and third, and fourth. Remember learning to march, and our first half-time show. Remember how if felt when we won our first contest. Remember thinking about how old all the seniors were. Remember when we got our permits. Remember going to Orlando. Remember growing older and going to high school.
Remember feeling like the old kids. Remember having Mr. Sparks, and always pulling pranks on him. Remember how everyone could do all of their math because of him. Remember everything we learned from him besides math. Remember getting our driver's licenses. Remember all the things we hit with our cars. Remember all the times we complained about wearing our band uniforms. Remember all the football games we won, and lost. Remember all the band contests we went to. Remember how we always complained about English in 10th grade. Remember how we couldn't stand our Spanish teachers. Remember how we loved Mrs. Huff and Mrs. Weygandt. Remember how we drug ourselves through the Nations game. Remember how we forced ourselves to do a History Day project. Remember how we always goofed off in Study Hall. Remember all the great times we had a play rehearsal. Remember all the high notes we sang, rounds of the awkward game we played, and lines we didn't really memorize. Remember Matt Nathanson, Maroon 5, and Train. Remember going to San Antonio. Remember watching all of our friends graduate and go to college. Remember finishing our junior year with the realization that we had only one year left. Remember Drama class, and choir, and band, and English, and History, and Math.
Remember everything, because it's almost gone. Remember everything, because everything is worth remembering. Remember our friends, our boyfriends and girlfriends, our teachers. Remember all the times you did something stupid. Remember every time we got teary eyed from laughing so hard. Remember all the movie nights, the dance parties, the road trips. Remember school and all the work we did, how we thought we would explode from all the stress. Remember applying to colleges and for scholarships. Remember acceptance letters, and choosing a college. Remember our last night as high school students. Remember getting our diplomas. Remember being done, and how we felt when we accomplished that goal that we've been working toward for the past eighteen years. Remember our final moments with our friends before we become college students. Remember our last summer together. Remember everything.
Remember all the times we had. Remember how we laughed and cried. Remember how we loved each other. Remember how we promised we'd always be friends, for the rest of our lives.
Remember me.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Georgia
Georgia.
This is my topic for my informational speech for Oral Communications. And not the state. Or the country. This Georgia happens to be one of the most awesome, most amazing, best friends in the entire history of the UNIVERSE!
Good thing I know a whole stupid bunch about her. This should be easy. And what's better, she is writing her speech about a topic almost as wonderful: me! We are going to have a lot of fun interviewing each other for this.
She is sitting beside me, currently reading what I am typing, but about thirty seconds ago she was working diligently, writing down random tidbits of information about yours truly. I have been doing nothing. She is very clearly a better student than I am.
Also, never google my name, because if you do, you will find out that I am dead, and I very clearly am not.
It's only first period, but this day is already looking to be better than the last!
This is my topic for my informational speech for Oral Communications. And not the state. Or the country. This Georgia happens to be one of the most awesome, most amazing, best friends in the entire history of the UNIVERSE!
Good thing I know a whole stupid bunch about her. This should be easy. And what's better, she is writing her speech about a topic almost as wonderful: me! We are going to have a lot of fun interviewing each other for this.
She is sitting beside me, currently reading what I am typing, but about thirty seconds ago she was working diligently, writing down random tidbits of information about yours truly. I have been doing nothing. She is very clearly a better student than I am.
Also, never google my name, because if you do, you will find out that I am dead, and I very clearly am not.
It's only first period, but this day is already looking to be better than the last!
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Packing Tips from Tosh
1. Pack lightly.
You may think this is a no-brainer, but you would be surprised how many people think they need eight outfits to choose from on every day of the trip. Take only what's necessary, people!
2. If you're flying, take only carry-ons.
If you can manage it, only pack a carry-on bag. It's so much easier. You don't have to worry about locating your luggage, or it getting stolen or lost. Also, it's usually cheaper!
3. Use a rolling bag.
If it's heavy and you're going to have to walk a lot, you definitely want wheels. Otherwise, you'll be cursing everyone and everything, and you'll have to get a massage and some Icy Hot for your shoulders when you get home.
4. Pack smaller items in larger items.
Small things like underwear, toothpaste, etc... Stuff them in your shoes! If your size 13 boots are taking up half of your suitcase, at least use the gigantic space inside for something!
5. Pack by size.
Put the biggest things in first, and work your way to the smallest. It's a lot easier to stuff in a few pairs of socks at the end, than a pair of pants with a 40 inch inseam. (Ryan)
6. Fold everything.
Once again, it sounds like a no-brainer, but some people actually do just throw everything in a bag and hit the road. Fold it, it saves space!
7. Organize.
Group everything together. Pants, shirts, toiletries, etc. It's easier to find things when you need them, and it uses space more efficiently than just stuffing things any and everywhere.
8. Pack one random item.
This doesn't do anything to help save space, or create organization or efficiency, but I always do this for fun. I like to have something odd with me everywhere I go. You never know when you'll need a cowbell/picture of you and your friends dressed like the Mystery Gang/bag of origami paper! (Yes, these are actual items I have packed before.)
Using all of these packing tips, you're almost guaranteed to have a better trip than the last!
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Anger is Danger
So I'm a little angry. SOMEONE is ticking me off, because SOMEONE refuses to communicate with me, and I have no idea what is going on with SOMEONE. (Someone, who shall, of course, remain nameless. Calling people out, especially in blog world, is just plain rude.)
So anyway, adding to my anger are a myriad of other small things, but I realize that when a lot of little things cause slight anger at the same time... It makes your anger get bigger. I secretly get mad in band because people don't want to work. They want to be great and win lots of prizes when we go to contest, but they don't want to put in the work now, and it's irritating. Some of us really love band and want to be there. Some of us work our tails off every time we step onto the field. Some of us get passionate when we see lazy people just moaning around on the field because they're "tired' or their "arms hurt." Well I have some words of encouragement for you: Get over it.
Then when we go inside to play I get mad because it's like people went home and forgot everything we worked on in the music the day before. Really people, retain knowledge. It's not that hard. Then I get a little more mad because people can't stinking count and keep time, so we get to play with Dr. Beat the whole time. For those of you who don't know who Dr. Beat it... Count your lucky stars.
Anyway, thinking about all this anger affecting me made me think about our children's Bible Hour at my church. My brother and I, every week at Bible Hour, put on a puppet show for the kiddos, and lately we've been talking about the Sermon on the Mount. Last week's particular lesson was about when Jesus talked about anger. The teacher Ms. Kay Ann taught the little ones about how anger can be very dangerous. Sometimes when we're mad, we do or say mean things, things we wouldn't normally do. We might curse, or insult someone, even hit them. And that's where the danger comes in.
She then went on to give a visual example about how "anger" is actually contained within the word "danger" then told a story about Sally and how one day she got angry and just bubbled up and exploded (Visually explained by mixing up baking soda and vinegar in poor little Sally).
Anyway, I thought about this and I realized that if I'm going to be angry, I'm going to have to control it. Sure anger isn't bad, but if we're going to be angry, it needs to be for the right reasons. Not over stupid, petty things, or misguided madness. But control is of the utmost importance.
I realize that if I yell at my fellow band mates, they won't respect me and take my leadership position seriously. I have to be nice, kind, and gentle, and use my teenage-ness (real word?) to encourage them in a way that I know would work with me. That's the thing about teens. We're all hard-headed little buggers. I know by experience that yelling, insulting, and anger does not make teens want to work harder, it usually makes them rebel more, so I know that I am going to try to have patience with my fellow band geeks, so that hopefully we will all work hard and have a magnificent competition season!
As a little challenge, I would like to encourage anyone who happens to see this post to do the same. It's not easy, but hey, when is anything ever easy? It'll take work, but at least people will respect you more!
Ephesians 4:26 - In your anger, do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.
So anyway, adding to my anger are a myriad of other small things, but I realize that when a lot of little things cause slight anger at the same time... It makes your anger get bigger. I secretly get mad in band because people don't want to work. They want to be great and win lots of prizes when we go to contest, but they don't want to put in the work now, and it's irritating. Some of us really love band and want to be there. Some of us work our tails off every time we step onto the field. Some of us get passionate when we see lazy people just moaning around on the field because they're "tired' or their "arms hurt." Well I have some words of encouragement for you: Get over it.
Then when we go inside to play I get mad because it's like people went home and forgot everything we worked on in the music the day before. Really people, retain knowledge. It's not that hard. Then I get a little more mad because people can't stinking count and keep time, so we get to play with Dr. Beat the whole time. For those of you who don't know who Dr. Beat it... Count your lucky stars.
Anyway, thinking about all this anger affecting me made me think about our children's Bible Hour at my church. My brother and I, every week at Bible Hour, put on a puppet show for the kiddos, and lately we've been talking about the Sermon on the Mount. Last week's particular lesson was about when Jesus talked about anger. The teacher Ms. Kay Ann taught the little ones about how anger can be very dangerous. Sometimes when we're mad, we do or say mean things, things we wouldn't normally do. We might curse, or insult someone, even hit them. And that's where the danger comes in.
She then went on to give a visual example about how "anger" is actually contained within the word "danger" then told a story about Sally and how one day she got angry and just bubbled up and exploded (Visually explained by mixing up baking soda and vinegar in poor little Sally).
Anyway, I thought about this and I realized that if I'm going to be angry, I'm going to have to control it. Sure anger isn't bad, but if we're going to be angry, it needs to be for the right reasons. Not over stupid, petty things, or misguided madness. But control is of the utmost importance.
I realize that if I yell at my fellow band mates, they won't respect me and take my leadership position seriously. I have to be nice, kind, and gentle, and use my teenage-ness (real word?) to encourage them in a way that I know would work with me. That's the thing about teens. We're all hard-headed little buggers. I know by experience that yelling, insulting, and anger does not make teens want to work harder, it usually makes them rebel more, so I know that I am going to try to have patience with my fellow band geeks, so that hopefully we will all work hard and have a magnificent competition season!
As a little challenge, I would like to encourage anyone who happens to see this post to do the same. It's not easy, but hey, when is anything ever easy? It'll take work, but at least people will respect you more!
Ephesians 4:26 - In your anger, do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Struck Down, But Not Destroyed
Today I sit here, knowing that in a week I will be going to bed to rest well before the first day of my senior year of high school. And I'm terrified.
Today I sit here, knowing that in a little under two weeks, I will be watching my sister going to college, moving out of the house, away from me. And I'm crushed.
Today I sit here, knowing that in a mere year, I will be the one moving into the dorm room, registering for my first semester of classes, living on my own, responsible for myself. And I panic. My heart races, and I'm more scared than I have ever been of anything in my entire life.
Most teenagers enter their senior year unable to wait for the last bell on their last day of school. I will enter dreading the passing of each week, each day that pushes me closer to that pivotal moment in my life where I will begin to decide upon a future for myself, what will define me for the rest of my life. I will become an adult, will take on responsibility for all aspects of my life, will graduate college, get a job, get married, have children, have grandchildren. Each of these things excites me beyond belief, but equal to the excitement is a terror that freezes me on the spot, that haunts me at night, and pushes me often to tears.
In all honesty, I don't know if I can adequately put into words how I fell right about now. If you've ever heard the song O Magnum Mysterium... You know the biggest part, where it gets loud and just...amazing? It's beautiful, yet one of the saddest things I've ever heard. Well that's how I feel.
As I sat here thinking about all of this tonight and freaking out, my best friend was confiding to me about his fears as well. I tried to be as encouraging as I could, tried to hide at least the worst of my fear, for his sake. At the moment, it wasn't about me. It was about helping a friend find comfort when he didn't know where to look for it. But silently, I felt all that he was feeling. I felt worried for my friends that are leaving, scared that we would lose communication. I felt scared most of all for my sister, who I have never been apart from for more than a few days. She is the one who knows me best, who has always been a constant in my life, and now she'll just cease to be down the hall whenever I need her. I hyperventilate a little every time I think about it.
Yet as I sat here in my despair, the same friend who I originally tried to comfort became my comfort, though he probably didn't realize it. He wanted me to read a post on his new blog, and reading it... I felt a strange sense of calm. Sure I'm still deathly terrified, but I understood my future in a way I'd never looked at it well enough before.
I will not only enter my future will courage, I will charge into it with inexpressible zeal. I will learn and love and live with absolutely no regrets, because everything happens for a reason, and regrets are a waste of time. They don't strength, they don't change the past, they only look down on a time when you were living life. And isn't that the point of this journey anyway? To live life, live it for the good, and live it to get to the real Life waiting for you at the end of the journey?
And that's what I found comfort in tonight as I sat reading my best friend's post. That no matter what is thrown at me, or those around me, in this helter skelter world, the Supreme One, the Father of us all, the one whose love for us fills the sky, is watching over me and guiding my every footstep. He truly is giving me a future. And what a wonderful future it is.
So was today better than the last? You better believe it.
Could we with ink the ocean fill, and were the skies of parchment made. Were every stalk on Earth a quill, and every man a scribe by trade. To write the love of God above would drain the ocean dry. Nor could the scroll contain the whole, though stretched from sky to sky.
Today I sit here, knowing that in a little under two weeks, I will be watching my sister going to college, moving out of the house, away from me. And I'm crushed.
Today I sit here, knowing that in a mere year, I will be the one moving into the dorm room, registering for my first semester of classes, living on my own, responsible for myself. And I panic. My heart races, and I'm more scared than I have ever been of anything in my entire life.
Most teenagers enter their senior year unable to wait for the last bell on their last day of school. I will enter dreading the passing of each week, each day that pushes me closer to that pivotal moment in my life where I will begin to decide upon a future for myself, what will define me for the rest of my life. I will become an adult, will take on responsibility for all aspects of my life, will graduate college, get a job, get married, have children, have grandchildren. Each of these things excites me beyond belief, but equal to the excitement is a terror that freezes me on the spot, that haunts me at night, and pushes me often to tears.
In all honesty, I don't know if I can adequately put into words how I fell right about now. If you've ever heard the song O Magnum Mysterium... You know the biggest part, where it gets loud and just...amazing? It's beautiful, yet one of the saddest things I've ever heard. Well that's how I feel.
As I sat here thinking about all of this tonight and freaking out, my best friend was confiding to me about his fears as well. I tried to be as encouraging as I could, tried to hide at least the worst of my fear, for his sake. At the moment, it wasn't about me. It was about helping a friend find comfort when he didn't know where to look for it. But silently, I felt all that he was feeling. I felt worried for my friends that are leaving, scared that we would lose communication. I felt scared most of all for my sister, who I have never been apart from for more than a few days. She is the one who knows me best, who has always been a constant in my life, and now she'll just cease to be down the hall whenever I need her. I hyperventilate a little every time I think about it.
Yet as I sat here in my despair, the same friend who I originally tried to comfort became my comfort, though he probably didn't realize it. He wanted me to read a post on his new blog, and reading it... I felt a strange sense of calm. Sure I'm still deathly terrified, but I understood my future in a way I'd never looked at it well enough before.
I will not only enter my future will courage, I will charge into it with inexpressible zeal. I will learn and love and live with absolutely no regrets, because everything happens for a reason, and regrets are a waste of time. They don't strength, they don't change the past, they only look down on a time when you were living life. And isn't that the point of this journey anyway? To live life, live it for the good, and live it to get to the real Life waiting for you at the end of the journey?
And that's what I found comfort in tonight as I sat reading my best friend's post. That no matter what is thrown at me, or those around me, in this helter skelter world, the Supreme One, the Father of us all, the one whose love for us fills the sky, is watching over me and guiding my every footstep. He truly is giving me a future. And what a wonderful future it is.
So was today better than the last? You better believe it.
Could we with ink the ocean fill, and were the skies of parchment made. Were every stalk on Earth a quill, and every man a scribe by trade. To write the love of God above would drain the ocean dry. Nor could the scroll contain the whole, though stretched from sky to sky.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Today I Did!!!.... Nothing.
I was EXTREMELY productive today. That is, if productive means sitting around and doing nothing. I stayed up all night because I couldn't sleep, finally dozed away, and woke up around 11:30. I know. Lazy butt. Anyway, I then proceeded to lay in bed and watch Friends, the best sitcom ever made. Ever. I had lunch, I swam for about an hour and a half. Then to books!
I did do one productive thing today: I cleaned all the hardwood in the house. And that alone was almost too much for me. I need to get ahold of some Ambien or something, see if I can fix this sleep problem I've developed. Thanks Mother, your genes suck.
Anyway, I need to pack, because tomorrow I head out to CHICAGO! Road trip with my sister and my favorite uncle, and no crazy fighting because none of the other siblings are going. Love them and love traveling with them, but sometimes it's nice not to hear yelling and bickering every five seconds. We're seeing Million Dollar Quartet while we're there, so hopefully that will be good. We'll see. My sister also expressed a vehement desire to go to a zoo, so I'll most likely be spending four to five hours walking around looking at precious animals. My heart feels for them sometimes though, holed up as they sometimes are.
Ah well, I must get my butt of the laptop I've been on for the past what... Two hours now? Gotta quit this. Today better than the last? Meh, not so much.
I did do one productive thing today: I cleaned all the hardwood in the house. And that alone was almost too much for me. I need to get ahold of some Ambien or something, see if I can fix this sleep problem I've developed. Thanks Mother, your genes suck.
Anyway, I need to pack, because tomorrow I head out to CHICAGO! Road trip with my sister and my favorite uncle, and no crazy fighting because none of the other siblings are going. Love them and love traveling with them, but sometimes it's nice not to hear yelling and bickering every five seconds. We're seeing Million Dollar Quartet while we're there, so hopefully that will be good. We'll see. My sister also expressed a vehement desire to go to a zoo, so I'll most likely be spending four to five hours walking around looking at precious animals. My heart feels for them sometimes though, holed up as they sometimes are.
Ah well, I must get my butt of the laptop I've been on for the past what... Two hours now? Gotta quit this. Today better than the last? Meh, not so much.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Three Family Members, Two Nights, and A Doctor
So I know that it's technically Tuesday now... But I'm going to pretend that it's still Monday.
I just got home a few hours ago from Dallas. I had an appointment with and orthopedic specialist there, but more on that in a minute. I traveled with my mother, sister, and brother, and it was a short and tiring trip. First, Brea was in a bad mood (like always) most of the time, so there was a lot of snapping, yelling, and bickering from her. Jerad was chill. We got there Saturday, had dinner, went to a movie, did a little shopping. But the real fun came yesterday when we went to Six Flags. Love me some roller coasters. It was stupid hot, but not very busy at all so we didn't have to do a lot of waiting in lines, and sometimes we didn't have to wait at all!
Then today came the appointment. So I was born without a properly formed left hip socket. Basically it just didn't exist. There was virtually no joint there, to put it simply. So seventeen years and seven surgeries later, I'm in Dallas for a check up with a doctor I started seeing last year. Basically just seeing what my hip is looking like, if it's bothering me, what to do in the future, etc. It was good news. Hip looks the same, everything's good, see you next summer! That's always good news. But now it's only a matter of time before that "everything's good" turns into "we might want to look into..." But oh well. There's nothing I can do about that.
Anyway, when all that was said and done, we headed home and arrive around 9:00-9:30ish. Since then I've been on this laptop, checking on Facebook, procrastinating on YouTube, finally cracking down on some English work, and then proceeding to this blog. Lovely.
So this weekend was good? Better than the last:)
I just got home a few hours ago from Dallas. I had an appointment with and orthopedic specialist there, but more on that in a minute. I traveled with my mother, sister, and brother, and it was a short and tiring trip. First, Brea was in a bad mood (like always) most of the time, so there was a lot of snapping, yelling, and bickering from her. Jerad was chill. We got there Saturday, had dinner, went to a movie, did a little shopping. But the real fun came yesterday when we went to Six Flags. Love me some roller coasters. It was stupid hot, but not very busy at all so we didn't have to do a lot of waiting in lines, and sometimes we didn't have to wait at all!
Then today came the appointment. So I was born without a properly formed left hip socket. Basically it just didn't exist. There was virtually no joint there, to put it simply. So seventeen years and seven surgeries later, I'm in Dallas for a check up with a doctor I started seeing last year. Basically just seeing what my hip is looking like, if it's bothering me, what to do in the future, etc. It was good news. Hip looks the same, everything's good, see you next summer! That's always good news. But now it's only a matter of time before that "everything's good" turns into "we might want to look into..." But oh well. There's nothing I can do about that.
Anyway, when all that was said and done, we headed home and arrive around 9:00-9:30ish. Since then I've been on this laptop, checking on Facebook, procrastinating on YouTube, finally cracking down on some English work, and then proceeding to this blog. Lovely.
So this weekend was good? Better than the last:)
Monday, July 11, 2011
Time on My Hands
Yesterday I had my last performance of The Twelve Dancing Princesses. I woke up today and realized that I no longer have to attend rehearsals three or four times a week. Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, I'm free at last! I did enjoy getting to hang out with most of the people in the play, and I had some really great times, but seriously, I couldn't be more happy that it's over. It was cute and everything, but in all honesty it was a little lame, which is to be expected since it's a little child's fairy tale. But it was great experience, since I love drama. It was actually my first starring role. I was Cornelia, the eldest princess, who found the man of her dreams and eventually married him. I mean it was my first starring role if you don't count the fact that I was Guenevere's understudy in Camelot, which technically I don't since I was the understudy. But I did get to perform as Guenevere, so I guess it was halfway a starring role.
Yesterday was a good day. Not only did we perform, I got to wear this amazing new dress that I got last week, and then we had pizza for supper, which I had been craving. I guess I enjoy the little things. But after the performance we had to strike, which wasn't exactly fun. Oh well. Yesterday pretty much was better than the day before.
I'm hoping the same will hold true for today. I woke up and cleaned my room up a bit, I'm about to watch Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets with my sister, and later several of my friends are coming over to swim, then Maria and Georgia are staying the night. So unless something catastrophic happens, today should be better than the last.
Yesterday was a good day. Not only did we perform, I got to wear this amazing new dress that I got last week, and then we had pizza for supper, which I had been craving. I guess I enjoy the little things. But after the performance we had to strike, which wasn't exactly fun. Oh well. Yesterday pretty much was better than the day before.
I'm hoping the same will hold true for today. I woke up and cleaned my room up a bit, I'm about to watch Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets with my sister, and later several of my friends are coming over to swim, then Maria and Georgia are staying the night. So unless something catastrophic happens, today should be better than the last.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Yesterday, All My Troubles Seemed to be Crushing Me
In my case at least, The Beatles had it wrong. Yesterday, did not in fact make my troubles seem far away. Yesterday actually gave me a lot of troubles. Today was much better.
Yesterday I woke up really early and drove to town to babysit. Yesterday my babysittees woke up really early. REALLY early. Yesterday I had a decrease in self-esteem. Yesterday I had dress-rehearsal, and a ballroom dress that my director did not like. Yesterday half the cast still did not know their lines. Yesterday the costume changes went horribly and took way too long, as did the scene changes. Yesterday I backed into a car leaving rehearsal. But after that, everything got better.
It was as if my horrible day just accumulated into that one horrible event, the worst of all, and then said "You know what? She's had enough. This is a wonderful climax to an awful day, she should be left alone now."
Yesterday, after leaving rehearsal, I went to Sonic with two friends, one of whom's parents own that Sonic, so he got me a free drink. A big free drink. Yesterday I drove to my grandparents with my big Sonic drink. Yesterday, at their house, I watched Friends with my Uncle and started laughing and feeling better. Yesterday I helped a friend with a summer assignment and then went to bed.
Today I woke up and went to babysit. Today my babysittees woke up 45 minutes before their mother got home, giving me time to relax and calm myself from the stress of yesterday. Today my babysittees mother informed me that her class is cancelled for tomorrow, so I get to sleep in. Today I went home and relaxed and didn't worry about the play. Today I finished a summer assignment that I had been worrying about, and I feel that I did pretty well on it. Today I got to blog all my troubles away. Today I am cooking dinner and having friends over to swim and just hang out with me. Today, undoubtedly, all my troubles seemed so far away.
So sorry McCartney and Lennon. Your song, at least this time, just didn't cut it for me.
Yesterday I woke up really early and drove to town to babysit. Yesterday my babysittees woke up really early. REALLY early. Yesterday I had a decrease in self-esteem. Yesterday I had dress-rehearsal, and a ballroom dress that my director did not like. Yesterday half the cast still did not know their lines. Yesterday the costume changes went horribly and took way too long, as did the scene changes. Yesterday I backed into a car leaving rehearsal. But after that, everything got better.
It was as if my horrible day just accumulated into that one horrible event, the worst of all, and then said "You know what? She's had enough. This is a wonderful climax to an awful day, she should be left alone now."
Yesterday, after leaving rehearsal, I went to Sonic with two friends, one of whom's parents own that Sonic, so he got me a free drink. A big free drink. Yesterday I drove to my grandparents with my big Sonic drink. Yesterday, at their house, I watched Friends with my Uncle and started laughing and feeling better. Yesterday I helped a friend with a summer assignment and then went to bed.
Today I woke up and went to babysit. Today my babysittees woke up 45 minutes before their mother got home, giving me time to relax and calm myself from the stress of yesterday. Today my babysittees mother informed me that her class is cancelled for tomorrow, so I get to sleep in. Today I went home and relaxed and didn't worry about the play. Today I finished a summer assignment that I had been worrying about, and I feel that I did pretty well on it. Today I got to blog all my troubles away. Today I am cooking dinner and having friends over to swim and just hang out with me. Today, undoubtedly, all my troubles seemed so far away.
So sorry McCartney and Lennon. Your song, at least this time, just didn't cut it for me.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Where Did the Weekend Go?
I woke up at 7:30, went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, brushed my hair, straightened my hair, did my make-up, got dressed, put on shoes, grabbed my keys and script and dancing shoes, walked out the door, drove to town.
I went to church, went to my grandma's house for lunch, went to play rehearsal, went back to church, went to Mi Ran for dinner with my brother, went home.
I got online, went to my AP Lit teacher's wiki, checked the next summer assignment, did half, stressed over the other half, edited the first half about 30 times, checked my friends' assignments, started blogging.
And here I sit.
Church was lovely. Lunch was, as always, delicious. Play rehearsal was...hot. The stage was so hot, and I sweated like no other. We have our first performance on Friday, so today we did two complete run-throughs of the show, no stops, right after the other. There was some set-awkwardness and a skipping problem during one of the waltzes, but hey, it didn't go too horribly.
So was today better than the last? Well, actually... No. Sorry.
Yesterday, for the first time in ages, I slept in! Until 10:00! It was amazing. It was the first day in weeks that I didn't have to worry about babysitting or play rehearsal or some other accursed thing. I lazed around for a little while, caught up on my Facebook and Twitter, and watched a little House. Then my best friend Crist (no it's not pronounced "Christ") and my boyfriend Ty came over and had dinner and swam with my sister and me. I had a great, fun, relaxing day.
So if today wasn't better than the last, and least yesterday was better than the one before it!
I went to church, went to my grandma's house for lunch, went to play rehearsal, went back to church, went to Mi Ran for dinner with my brother, went home.
I got online, went to my AP Lit teacher's wiki, checked the next summer assignment, did half, stressed over the other half, edited the first half about 30 times, checked my friends' assignments, started blogging.
And here I sit.
Church was lovely. Lunch was, as always, delicious. Play rehearsal was...hot. The stage was so hot, and I sweated like no other. We have our first performance on Friday, so today we did two complete run-throughs of the show, no stops, right after the other. There was some set-awkwardness and a skipping problem during one of the waltzes, but hey, it didn't go too horribly.
So was today better than the last? Well, actually... No. Sorry.
Yesterday, for the first time in ages, I slept in! Until 10:00! It was amazing. It was the first day in weeks that I didn't have to worry about babysitting or play rehearsal or some other accursed thing. I lazed around for a little while, caught up on my Facebook and Twitter, and watched a little House. Then my best friend Crist (no it's not pronounced "Christ") and my boyfriend Ty came over and had dinner and swam with my sister and me. I had a great, fun, relaxing day.
So if today wasn't better than the last, and least yesterday was better than the one before it!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Exhaustion
I don't know what I was thinking when I agreed to babysit this summer. Every weekday, I wake up at 5:45, travel to town, and babysit until eleven. The dad works, the mom is taking a college class, the kids need someone to watch over them and make sure they brush their teeth and don't fight. And somehow, I got that job.
Not that I don't enjoy it. The kids are great. They never make me ask twice, I have yet to see them fight, and only one of them needs the occasional reminder to brush her teeth. But still, 5:45. It's pretty sad when I have to wake up earlier during the summer than I did for school. At least I'm getting paid.
After babysitting, I went to my grandparents house where I spent about an hour and a half reading the latest Sarah Dessen book. I simply CANNOT resist her novels. The characters, I can always relate to, the relationships, I fawn over. The books always find a way to speak to me, often about things I find myself having trouble with. Kudos, Sarah Dessen. Kudos.
After my reading adventure, I journeyed to Georgia's house, then on to Wal-Mart with her to purchase a birthday present for one of our closest friends, Ethan. He turns sixteen Saturday (watch out drivers!). He had an unbelievably atypical childhood. No typical toys, candies, books, and he's only seen about five movies. Seriously, he owns two movies, which he lost the actual discs to, so technically now he only owns two movie cases. Georgia and I decided to make him a Your Guide to a Normal Childhood gift basket. It includes: Sixteen Candles and The Austin Powers movies (movies that EVERYONE has seen), Where the Wild Things Are (the book), Bottle Caps and Gummy LifeSavers, a toy dinosaur, a Hot Wheels Car, and a T-Shirt that features every Mario Brothers character known to man. We find this gift basket to be one of the best presents we have ever assembled.
From this jaunt, I moved onto play rehearsal. We ran the first ten scenes of the play, and it didn't go horribly, I am happy to say. There were some awkward set transitions, but that's expected the first time, and we didn't actually do any of our dances... We just kind of skipped the, but we don't know them all yet. We're learning the rest Saturday. So far we've learned two waltzes and a hip-hop. We have to learn two discos. But tonight was actually a pretty good rehearsal, and I had a lot of fun.
So, without a doubt, this day was better than the last. :)
Not that I don't enjoy it. The kids are great. They never make me ask twice, I have yet to see them fight, and only one of them needs the occasional reminder to brush her teeth. But still, 5:45. It's pretty sad when I have to wake up earlier during the summer than I did for school. At least I'm getting paid.
After babysitting, I went to my grandparents house where I spent about an hour and a half reading the latest Sarah Dessen book. I simply CANNOT resist her novels. The characters, I can always relate to, the relationships, I fawn over. The books always find a way to speak to me, often about things I find myself having trouble with. Kudos, Sarah Dessen. Kudos.
After my reading adventure, I journeyed to Georgia's house, then on to Wal-Mart with her to purchase a birthday present for one of our closest friends, Ethan. He turns sixteen Saturday (watch out drivers!). He had an unbelievably atypical childhood. No typical toys, candies, books, and he's only seen about five movies. Seriously, he owns two movies, which he lost the actual discs to, so technically now he only owns two movie cases. Georgia and I decided to make him a Your Guide to a Normal Childhood gift basket. It includes: Sixteen Candles and The Austin Powers movies (movies that EVERYONE has seen), Where the Wild Things Are (the book), Bottle Caps and Gummy LifeSavers, a toy dinosaur, a Hot Wheels Car, and a T-Shirt that features every Mario Brothers character known to man. We find this gift basket to be one of the best presents we have ever assembled.
From this jaunt, I moved onto play rehearsal. We ran the first ten scenes of the play, and it didn't go horribly, I am happy to say. There were some awkward set transitions, but that's expected the first time, and we didn't actually do any of our dances... We just kind of skipped the, but we don't know them all yet. We're learning the rest Saturday. So far we've learned two waltzes and a hip-hop. We have to learn two discos. But tonight was actually a pretty good rehearsal, and I had a lot of fun.
So, without a doubt, this day was better than the last. :)
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Once Again...
Once again I have managed to trap myself in the soul-consuming world of theater... And I'm loving it.
Every summer my town's community theater does a fairytale, this year The Twelve Dancing Princesses, and I am Cornelia, the eldest. I dance the night away with my eleven sisters and a lot of princes, I have a repressive father who never lets me leave the house, and I end up finding the man of my dreams and getting engaged to be married. All in a day's work.
There are so many precious little kids in this play. Young princes and princesses and fairy waitresses (I don't get it either) and they are all so stinking adorable. Especially when they dance. Today at rehearsal we finished learning one of our dances, a Viennese Waltz. The tiny ones look so cute spinning around the stage. No one in the audience will even realize that the older performers actually know the complete dance and actually look legit because they'll be too busy fawning over the little ones. Lovely.
This has definitely been an adventure so far because well... I don't dance. Seriously, my only experience is random dance parties with my friends, prom, and what we did for Camelot. This is WAY harder. I have been practicing though! Let's hope I don't fall at any of the performances.
So besides play practice today I went to church, helped with the children's Bible Hour, and had a cookout at my house with my family beside the pool! It was great!
So, good day? Most definitely better than the last!
(P.S. Here's the link the my ePortfolio that I said I would post. Even though I still have no followers... Awkward. Maybe I would if I actually blogged a little more...)
Every summer my town's community theater does a fairytale, this year The Twelve Dancing Princesses, and I am Cornelia, the eldest. I dance the night away with my eleven sisters and a lot of princes, I have a repressive father who never lets me leave the house, and I end up finding the man of my dreams and getting engaged to be married. All in a day's work.
There are so many precious little kids in this play. Young princes and princesses and fairy waitresses (I don't get it either) and they are all so stinking adorable. Especially when they dance. Today at rehearsal we finished learning one of our dances, a Viennese Waltz. The tiny ones look so cute spinning around the stage. No one in the audience will even realize that the older performers actually know the complete dance and actually look legit because they'll be too busy fawning over the little ones. Lovely.
This has definitely been an adventure so far because well... I don't dance. Seriously, my only experience is random dance parties with my friends, prom, and what we did for Camelot. This is WAY harder. I have been practicing though! Let's hope I don't fall at any of the performances.
So besides play practice today I went to church, helped with the children's Bible Hour, and had a cookout at my house with my family beside the pool! It was great!
So, good day? Most definitely better than the last!
(P.S. Here's the link the my ePortfolio that I said I would post. Even though I still have no followers... Awkward. Maybe I would if I actually blogged a little more...)
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
English and the Portfolio it Forces Me to Create
Today I took a quiz on my last history chapter. It was the fortieth chapter of the year, and I was so ready for it. So many hours of reading my text book and looking up terms, of taking notes and crying (just kidding...but seriously), and I am done! I have read almost 1000 pages of that text book. Insane.
My school year is coming to a close. I just finished a project for Spanish, we finished the Nations Game in History and took a test on it today, we are done in Chemistry... Now I just have to finish the rest of my assignments. A little more math, an essay for History, a completed portfolio for AP Lang, and studying for my semester tests. And then I will be a senior. Yikes!
Going back to that portfolio... I am almost finished. Yay! I have been building it for about a week now, and I think I have put more work into it than a mother puts into raising her firstborn. Okay that was a bit of a hyperbole, but seriously... I have worked on it for hours every single night, but that is probably just because I am an overachiever. I have far surpassed the requirements. All we HAD to do was include a resume, reading list, and four pieces of school work that display accumulated skills. I don't know why I felt the need to go above that, but alas I did, and so now my portfolio not only includes pages for reading, writing, and a resume, but band and drama, as well as a page for an additional project that I am very proud of. I have included pictures and videos, and small tidbits about the very essence of Natasha. Mrs. Huff would be proud. I am currently working on this portfolio actually... And have been since about four hours ago.
So good day?... Better than the last.
My school year is coming to a close. I just finished a project for Spanish, we finished the Nations Game in History and took a test on it today, we are done in Chemistry... Now I just have to finish the rest of my assignments. A little more math, an essay for History, a completed portfolio for AP Lang, and studying for my semester tests. And then I will be a senior. Yikes!
Going back to that portfolio... I am almost finished. Yay! I have been building it for about a week now, and I think I have put more work into it than a mother puts into raising her firstborn. Okay that was a bit of a hyperbole, but seriously... I have worked on it for hours every single night, but that is probably just because I am an overachiever. I have far surpassed the requirements. All we HAD to do was include a resume, reading list, and four pieces of school work that display accumulated skills. I don't know why I felt the need to go above that, but alas I did, and so now my portfolio not only includes pages for reading, writing, and a resume, but band and drama, as well as a page for an additional project that I am very proud of. I have included pictures and videos, and small tidbits about the very essence of Natasha. Mrs. Huff would be proud. I am currently working on this portfolio actually... And have been since about four hours ago.
So good day?... Better than the last.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Graduation Weekend
My sister graduated Friday.
Our whole family went to eat before the commencement and while we were having dinner I gave her her present from me. I wrote a letter to go with the present and when she read it she started crying, so I started crying, so my mom started crying. Brea stopped but my mother and I couldn't, so we just sat at the table crying for about five minutes or so. It was actually pretty humorous, even though it was extremely sad.
After that I stayed out all night with some of my friends. We worked really hard to keep our minds off of our friends and family that had just finished high school. Needless to say, I was quite worthless the next day. I came home around noon and took a nap from about four to six thirty or so.
Today I went to church and taught the little toddlers' class at church. A room full of children of two and three... Not a good remedy for a sleep deprived teenager. Oh well. But, the children did inspire me. I love them to death, they are precious, and they remind me that there is more to the world that worrying about your older sister going off to college. They remind me that there are countless others in the world to love and care for. And that is marvelous.
So, good weekend? Definitely better than the last. :)
Our whole family went to eat before the commencement and while we were having dinner I gave her her present from me. I wrote a letter to go with the present and when she read it she started crying, so I started crying, so my mom started crying. Brea stopped but my mother and I couldn't, so we just sat at the table crying for about five minutes or so. It was actually pretty humorous, even though it was extremely sad.
After that I stayed out all night with some of my friends. We worked really hard to keep our minds off of our friends and family that had just finished high school. Needless to say, I was quite worthless the next day. I came home around noon and took a nap from about four to six thirty or so.
Today I went to church and taught the little toddlers' class at church. A room full of children of two and three... Not a good remedy for a sleep deprived teenager. Oh well. But, the children did inspire me. I love them to death, they are precious, and they remind me that there is more to the world that worrying about your older sister going off to college. They remind me that there are countless others in the world to love and care for. And that is marvelous.
So, good weekend? Definitely better than the last. :)
Thursday, May 19, 2011
My Memory
My memory is a very odd thing. When it comes to dates, random facts, odd tidbits of information that really don't matter... My memory is excellent. Even in school, I have an uncanny ability to remember history terms or chemical equations after only a glance. I can recall something that I learned about in history six months back. But when it comes to blogging... I simply cannot remember to do so. It's been weeks since I last posted!
So since I've lasted blogged, a great many occurrences have plagued my life. I took two AP exams (Chemistry and English Language) and hopefully passed them, but we will see about that in July. I have watched my sister complete her last day of high school, and will watch her graduate tomorrow. I have pretty much done everything except blog. I WILL remember (but really, I probably won't).
I am currently working on an ePortfolio to document my achievement in school, especially AP English, since it is for this class that I am creating the portfolio. I'll try to post a link when I am finished. By the way, if anyone is a moonfruit.com genius, I could use your assistance.
So today was pretty good. I had a normal day in math, a better than usual day in study hall, a great day in English since we went to the computer lab, and a melancholy day in band. All the seniors came back to band to rehearse one last time the song that we are playing at graduation. It was just sad to see them all in the band room as band students for the last time, especially since one was my sister. I will miss them all.
So all in all, was today a good one? Better than the last.
So since I've lasted blogged, a great many occurrences have plagued my life. I took two AP exams (Chemistry and English Language) and hopefully passed them, but we will see about that in July. I have watched my sister complete her last day of high school, and will watch her graduate tomorrow. I have pretty much done everything except blog. I WILL remember (but really, I probably won't).
I am currently working on an ePortfolio to document my achievement in school, especially AP English, since it is for this class that I am creating the portfolio. I'll try to post a link when I am finished. By the way, if anyone is a moonfruit.com genius, I could use your assistance.
So today was pretty good. I had a normal day in math, a better than usual day in study hall, a great day in English since we went to the computer lab, and a melancholy day in band. All the seniors came back to band to rehearse one last time the song that we are playing at graduation. It was just sad to see them all in the band room as band students for the last time, especially since one was my sister. I will miss them all.
So all in all, was today a good one? Better than the last.
Friday, April 29, 2011
And the Point Would be...?
What exactly is the point of blogging? Expressing views and opinions, that's great and everything, but I have this theory that the majority of those who blog just... don't actually have views or opinions.
Well I'm sure they do, but they never share them on their blog. At least not the substantial ones. It's always "Kate Winslet is gorgeous!" or "The Royal Wedding will be fantastic!" Most people never talk about anything actually substantial and beneficiary in their blogs, which is actually kind of sad.
So why then do people blog? I have a theory. People want attention. They want other people to care about their lives. And if other people don't, in fact, care, they at least want to feel as though those people do.
The human race is wildly codependent. We need constant love and care, reminders that there are others just like us out there, that we're never alone. So naturally, we want someone to worry about our deepest fears, desires, and everyday occurrences. We expect people to want to know that we went to the store and bought a loaf of bread, three packs of batteries, and a stick of deodorant, yet at the same time we know that no one wants to listen to that lousy of a story. So we flock to our blogs, embellish a little, and give a play out of our day. Hmmm... I've decided that's what blogs are. Outlets for our daily stories that we so desperately want someone to care enough to listen to.
Oh well... Now that I've spewed my thoughts, on to my day. Community theater auditions with my friend Alex and boyfriend Ty=Amazing. We had so much fun. And then this boy decided to teach us all about doing the Thriller dance. Not too eventful of a day, but all in all, good? Better than the last.
Well I'm sure they do, but they never share them on their blog. At least not the substantial ones. It's always "Kate Winslet is gorgeous!" or "The Royal Wedding will be fantastic!" Most people never talk about anything actually substantial and beneficiary in their blogs, which is actually kind of sad.
So why then do people blog? I have a theory. People want attention. They want other people to care about their lives. And if other people don't, in fact, care, they at least want to feel as though those people do.
The human race is wildly codependent. We need constant love and care, reminders that there are others just like us out there, that we're never alone. So naturally, we want someone to worry about our deepest fears, desires, and everyday occurrences. We expect people to want to know that we went to the store and bought a loaf of bread, three packs of batteries, and a stick of deodorant, yet at the same time we know that no one wants to listen to that lousy of a story. So we flock to our blogs, embellish a little, and give a play out of our day. Hmmm... I've decided that's what blogs are. Outlets for our daily stories that we so desperately want someone to care enough to listen to.
Oh well... Now that I've spewed my thoughts, on to my day. Community theater auditions with my friend Alex and boyfriend Ty=Amazing. We had so much fun. And then this boy decided to teach us all about doing the Thriller dance. Not too eventful of a day, but all in all, good? Better than the last.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Study Hall? For three hours?
I had three straight hours of study hall today.
We have block scheduling at our school and therefore our class periods are an hour and a half long. The tenth graders were taking Geometry end of course, and my precal teacher was administering the test, so during first period my math class had a study hall. At the bell, I went to my next class which happened to be nothing other than...study hall. Great. So I sat for three hours, just reading. Now don't get me wrong, I love reading. I'm currently in the middle of Les Miserables and I'm loving it. But I'm just wondering...if I'm going to school to sit around for three hours...is there really any point in me being there? Seriously, couldn't I have just come to school at the end of second period? Oh well... Then after lunch I went to AP Language, where I was once again lucky enough to write a timed argument essay. I was so out of it and just ready to go home that I'm not even sure if I actually ever supported, refuted, or qualified Ehenreich's claim in the prompt... I think I made a claim, but I'm not sure:)
Then to band for final hour. It was okay, but we're playing a suite from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince...I really hate that piece. It's soooo corny. But Hallie and I did have a nice discussion with our director about next year's marching show. We're trying to convince him that Lion King is the way to go.
So all in all, good day? Better than the last.
We have block scheduling at our school and therefore our class periods are an hour and a half long. The tenth graders were taking Geometry end of course, and my precal teacher was administering the test, so during first period my math class had a study hall. At the bell, I went to my next class which happened to be nothing other than...study hall. Great. So I sat for three hours, just reading. Now don't get me wrong, I love reading. I'm currently in the middle of Les Miserables and I'm loving it. But I'm just wondering...if I'm going to school to sit around for three hours...is there really any point in me being there? Seriously, couldn't I have just come to school at the end of second period? Oh well... Then after lunch I went to AP Language, where I was once again lucky enough to write a timed argument essay. I was so out of it and just ready to go home that I'm not even sure if I actually ever supported, refuted, or qualified Ehenreich's claim in the prompt... I think I made a claim, but I'm not sure:)
Then to band for final hour. It was okay, but we're playing a suite from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince...I really hate that piece. It's soooo corny. But Hallie and I did have a nice discussion with our director about next year's marching show. We're trying to convince him that Lion King is the way to go.
So all in all, good day? Better than the last.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Making it Better
Was today a good day? Not really. I had a math quiz and then made up a history test and then had the privilege (sarcasm) of writing a timed argument essay in English. But my day was made about thirty times better when I found a picture of my drama teacher in a 1994 yearbook. Amazing.
And then naturally, on a day that the world wants to treat me not so nicely, I would have to meet my boyfriend's mother, who already doesn't really like me. Seriously, she disliked me without having met me. But it's not my fault. Ty's best friend explained it to me. It was more that we had been together for quite a while and he hadn't really made any initiative to take me to meet her. So it wasn't really that she disliked me, it was that she disliked the idea of me because of his procrastination of the "meeting the parents" thing. But thankfully, she was extremely nice and I really liked her a lot. We talked for a little while and were laughing, so hopefully she liked me too. :/
So anyway it wasn't the hottest of days, but I am still fighting for my constant goal of making each day better than the last. So was today a good day? Maybe not better than the last, but definitely all right.
And then naturally, on a day that the world wants to treat me not so nicely, I would have to meet my boyfriend's mother, who already doesn't really like me. Seriously, she disliked me without having met me. But it's not my fault. Ty's best friend explained it to me. It was more that we had been together for quite a while and he hadn't really made any initiative to take me to meet her. So it wasn't really that she disliked me, it was that she disliked the idea of me because of his procrastination of the "meeting the parents" thing. But thankfully, she was extremely nice and I really liked her a lot. We talked for a little while and were laughing, so hopefully she liked me too. :/
So anyway it wasn't the hottest of days, but I am still fighting for my constant goal of making each day better than the last. So was today a good day? Maybe not better than the last, but definitely all right.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Impact of the Small
We got through our last performance of Camelot and it was amazing! We laughed, we hugged, and we definitely cried. The sadness of course was partly because it was our last show together. Never again will we be that same group, the group of Camelot 2011 from Batesville High. Never again will we have the exact same collection of people working to pull a show together. It is sad to think about, but we will at least have the amazing memories we have made over the past few months. A good chunk of the sadness, however, was the seniors. To those seniors in the cast... It was the last show they will ever do with Batesville High. It is most likely the last show they will ever do with anyone in the cast. It is the last show they will do before they venture into the real world to make it on their own. Between the fact that my sister is one of those seniors, and that next year I will be... I was pretty devestated. Heart broken. Crushed. My heart literally hurt. To Breanna, Jennifer, Zach, Rachel, Haley, and Ashley... Thank you for sharing your final year with us and break a leg out in the real world.
We were at our cast party and instead of laughing and messing around, we all ended up crying and having a huge hug fest. It was one of the best moments of my life. I will always cherish the months that I had with this cast and I will have great memories to carry with me for the rest of my life. I will never forget a single soul that I had the privelege to work with, and I will love each of them forever. I will look back on this show with absolutely no regrets, no wishful thinking, and if I could go back, I would not change one single thing about the show and the time that I spent with those amazing people who are some of my closest friends. And most importantly, I will never forget the lessons I learned: that even the most odd arrangement of people can come together to create something beautiful. That the most unexpected people can change your life, make you a better person, move you to see things differently. That some people surpass your previous conceptions and literally blow your mind. And that sometimes... The most amazing, beautiful, meaningful, and breathtaking moments are the things that don't seem important. The thirty minutes before show when everyone is stressed. The moment when you're standing in the wings watching a scene, waiting for your entrance. The moment when the cast gathers on the stage one last time to sing a final "Lean on Me" while their hair sparkles with pixie dust. And especially that moment when everyone gets one final hug, takes one final look around, and walks out the door one final time as a member of the cast of Camelot. Because when everyone crosses the threshold of that door... It's all over. Never again will we all be together in the same place, in the same cast, doing the same show, all working together for the same goal. But we will always, always be Camelot 2011.
So was today a good day? Definitely better than the last.
The Melting Pot of Me
Is it bad that I forgot I created this blog? Whoops... My goal is to not forget this time:) So Camelot... I'm in a play. I sold my soul to it, in fact. At least four days a week I'm at school for around three to four hours rehearsing for Camelot. Sometimes five days. But today is the last day for all of that. Our last performance. I'm a melting pot of emotion right now. I'm super excited that I'll have so much free time to work on my homework and such, but I'll be so sad when it's all over... Especially because of all the seniors who won't be back next year. Why do people have to grow up?
Yesterday I went to a movie with a few of my friends and saw Soul Surfer. I'd read the book and so naturally, I had to see the movie. It was actually amazing and I do admit to sniffling and tearing up a bit. I was so inspired by the story, and anyone who is struggling to get some perspective should definitely take a trip to the movie theater.
So am I ready for today? Hopefully, it will be better than the last.
Yesterday I went to a movie with a few of my friends and saw Soul Surfer. I'd read the book and so naturally, I had to see the movie. It was actually amazing and I do admit to sniffling and tearing up a bit. I was so inspired by the story, and anyone who is struggling to get some perspective should definitely take a trip to the movie theater.
So am I ready for today? Hopefully, it will be better than the last.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Secrets
Who likes secrets? If you're the one keeping them, then maybe. But when they're being kept from you? No way.
I've got a this friend named Georgia. She likes to keep secrets from me with my boyfriend Ty. I'm serious. They take great fun in developing a secret and then going to great lengths to keep it from me. George once, in fact, told EVERY SINGLE ONE OF MY FRIENDS a big huge secret that was COMPLETELY about me, and refused to tell me. Sure, I eventually found out, and true, I was happy I didn't know about the secret until I found out, but still... I develop ulcers okay?
Okay so maybe I don't develop ulcers. But I do constantly obsess over what the secret is. I can't help it, I'm extremely dedicated to everything I pursue.
So anyway, the whole basis of this post is that Ty and George have once again banded together to conceal another great mystery. At least this time I'm not alone in not knowing what it is. Apparently, the surprise is a "present" for myself, and my friends Lauren and Ethan. Hmmm.... All I have to say is that this better be good. They better be taking us skydiving or something.
All in all, good day? Better than the last.
I've got a this friend named Georgia. She likes to keep secrets from me with my boyfriend Ty. I'm serious. They take great fun in developing a secret and then going to great lengths to keep it from me. George once, in fact, told EVERY SINGLE ONE OF MY FRIENDS a big huge secret that was COMPLETELY about me, and refused to tell me. Sure, I eventually found out, and true, I was happy I didn't know about the secret until I found out, but still... I develop ulcers okay?
Okay so maybe I don't develop ulcers. But I do constantly obsess over what the secret is. I can't help it, I'm extremely dedicated to everything I pursue.
So anyway, the whole basis of this post is that Ty and George have once again banded together to conceal another great mystery. At least this time I'm not alone in not knowing what it is. Apparently, the surprise is a "present" for myself, and my friends Lauren and Ethan. Hmmm.... All I have to say is that this better be good. They better be taking us skydiving or something.
All in all, good day? Better than the last.
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